During Allister's seventh year, he discovered the wonderful joys of burying things. It has been speculated that perhaps Allister read Treasure Island one time too many and, although life with only one eye and one leg was not appealing, the idea of burying objects where no one could find them sparked his interest. Allister became obsessed. He began burying simple things at first, things that did not matter much to anyone. He buried rocks and sticks and lint and that sort of thing. When the simple fascination of just putting dirt on top of something wore off, he moved on to more advanced burying: shovels, crayons, his neighbor's toys, things like that. This quickly got old and he realized he needed some purpose for burying, some logical reason, a way to connect his obsession with daily life. He would bury his lunch in the playground at school to prevent bullies from taking it. He buried the clothes he was planning on wearing the next day and spent the entire morning trying to dig them up again. To Allister, it was all making sense now. He was a born burier-a boy with a mission. Soon enough, he was burying bigger and better things. He got half way to burying his father's Ford Model S before the elder Cromley saw what Allister was doing and promptly put a stop to it. His parents took him to counseling, but that did not last long. In those days, therapy was still in its infancy. Therapists themselves tended to be insecure people and Allister had put up such a great case for the therapeutic value of burying things that his psychiatrist was inspired to start a new life-burying things-and immediately began by burying his practice.
As he grew older (to about seven and a half), Allister decided to give up burying. Well, for a while anyway. He was going through a mid-seven-year-old crisis and was no sure what he wanted out of life. He needed some time to think. But, the calling was true. One day, his cousin, Timothy, and he were taking naps at his grandparents' house. Allister woke up a tad early, whilst his cousin was still fast asleep. On later recollection, Allister was not sure where his grandparents were. But, in their absence, Allister suddenly got a wonderful idea for a joke. He went outside, dug a hole in the woods, and put his cousin in it. He covered Timothy up ever so carefully and went back, giggling the whole way. Timothy was sure going to be surprised when he woke up. Or so Allister thought.
When their grandparents finally did show up, they asked Allister where Timothy was. Allister, to preserve the humor of course, said he did not know. His grandparents seemed upset when Timothy's parents arrived and Timothy still was not answering their call (and to be most accurate, they had been upset for three and a half hours before that). Allister could sense that there was a possibility that he might get in trouble. So, he acted quickly. He said, "I think Timothy buried himself. Yeah, he has been talking about it all day. I told him he should not, but you know Timothy. Once he sets his mind on something he just sticks to it. He is so stubborn. Remember when he said he wanted to be a dinosaur when he grew up and we just kept saying, 'Timmy, you cannot," but, he just wouldn't listen?" It is most likely that three quarters of Allister's statement went unheard because the adults present sprinted out the door the second Allister mentioned Timothy burying himself. It surprised Allister that they believed his story so easily, what with his storied background in burying things, but they grabbed shovels and tore up his grandparents' yard without any accusations. They searched for days and never found Timothy. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that they never really checked the woods. In Allister's eighth year, he realized it had been his responsibility to tell them. But, at the time, he had other things on his mind at the time (a big test in school was fast approaching).
This story does have a happy ending, though. Years and years later, Allister's family had a reunion at his grandparents' house and who do you think emerged from the woods, scouring for food? Little cousin Timothy-only he was not little anymore. He was a grown man (also, a rather embarrassing and somewhat obvious sidenote: he had outgrown his clothes leaving him completely bare in all his glory). He told the family of his experience. How he woke up and came to the conclusion that he must have buried himself in his sleep. He was content underground for a while, but then he started to get lonely. Upon further inspection, he deduced that he was hungry, thirsty, and suffocating, as well. And when he was certain he was about to reach the apex of despair and malnutrition, he heard hooves. A pack of deer dug him up and raised him. He lived with them for all that time, learning the ways of the forest until, one day, he saw his reflection in a pond and realized that he was the only grown male without antlers. So, Timothy decided to go and find where he really belonged. Luck brought him to the reunion. And, from then on, the entire family lived happily ever after. So you see, the moral of this story is that sometimes it is okay to not tell the truth. Nature has a way of handling things on its own.
As he grew older (to about seven and a half), Allister decided to give up burying. Well, for a while anyway. He was going through a mid-seven-year-old crisis and was no sure what he wanted out of life. He needed some time to think. But, the calling was true. One day, his cousin, Timothy, and he were taking naps at his grandparents' house. Allister woke up a tad early, whilst his cousin was still fast asleep. On later recollection, Allister was not sure where his grandparents were. But, in their absence, Allister suddenly got a wonderful idea for a joke. He went outside, dug a hole in the woods, and put his cousin in it. He covered Timothy up ever so carefully and went back, giggling the whole way. Timothy was sure going to be surprised when he woke up. Or so Allister thought.
When their grandparents finally did show up, they asked Allister where Timothy was. Allister, to preserve the humor of course, said he did not know. His grandparents seemed upset when Timothy's parents arrived and Timothy still was not answering their call (and to be most accurate, they had been upset for three and a half hours before that). Allister could sense that there was a possibility that he might get in trouble. So, he acted quickly. He said, "I think Timothy buried himself. Yeah, he has been talking about it all day. I told him he should not, but you know Timothy. Once he sets his mind on something he just sticks to it. He is so stubborn. Remember when he said he wanted to be a dinosaur when he grew up and we just kept saying, 'Timmy, you cannot," but, he just wouldn't listen?" It is most likely that three quarters of Allister's statement went unheard because the adults present sprinted out the door the second Allister mentioned Timothy burying himself. It surprised Allister that they believed his story so easily, what with his storied background in burying things, but they grabbed shovels and tore up his grandparents' yard without any accusations. They searched for days and never found Timothy. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that they never really checked the woods. In Allister's eighth year, he realized it had been his responsibility to tell them. But, at the time, he had other things on his mind at the time (a big test in school was fast approaching).
This story does have a happy ending, though. Years and years later, Allister's family had a reunion at his grandparents' house and who do you think emerged from the woods, scouring for food? Little cousin Timothy-only he was not little anymore. He was a grown man (also, a rather embarrassing and somewhat obvious sidenote: he had outgrown his clothes leaving him completely bare in all his glory). He told the family of his experience. How he woke up and came to the conclusion that he must have buried himself in his sleep. He was content underground for a while, but then he started to get lonely. Upon further inspection, he deduced that he was hungry, thirsty, and suffocating, as well. And when he was certain he was about to reach the apex of despair and malnutrition, he heard hooves. A pack of deer dug him up and raised him. He lived with them for all that time, learning the ways of the forest until, one day, he saw his reflection in a pond and realized that he was the only grown male without antlers. So, Timothy decided to go and find where he really belonged. Luck brought him to the reunion. And, from then on, the entire family lived happily ever after. So you see, the moral of this story is that sometimes it is okay to not tell the truth. Nature has a way of handling things on its own.
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